ARCHIEVE 20

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Eh, Eh, There's nothing else I can say.
Current mood: contemplative
I couldn't help but to tap into my insights on life. How "against the grain" they really are. It baffles me that so many people are trying to pair off so quickly. Settle down. Give up a part of themselves. Create this fairy tale life that society demands of.

Growing up, we are made out to believe that relationships are suppose to have these "milestones". That at some point, you should think about the next point and then so on. It seems like in relationships, some of us are trying to quickly beat the game. Gather all of these objects so you can say you have done them. First kiss, first time having sex, first night over, getting a drawer at their house, moving in together, getting engaged, getting married, having kids, buying a home. All these things are felt like they should be done in a relationship. Most of us give into the pressure of the moment because "it feels like we should be at this stage in the relationship" or "we should be looking towards the next stage".

So when did relationships have to have "stages"?
What happened to just taking it "one day at a time"?
How did we become so preoccupied with what we should be doing in the relationship, with what we are actually doing? It's silly that people become so worked up and stressed about why they aren't in certain stages of their relationship. We almost begin to think that there is something wrong with our relationships because we haven't met the "requirements". So we fool ourselves into another game that society has created.

Everyone in my life seems to have this outlook on these "stages". Whereas I am just too free spirited to give a fuck. So what if it's been 30 years and I don't live with my partner. If it works for us, why fix what isn't broken? Why change something because it looks better on the outside? I won't.

I have fallen into the prey of this too many times. Fuck, one of my ex boyfriends wanted to propose because he felt like it was that "time". I was 15. Like, what the fuck are you thinking?

What is the rush in relationships? Why is everyone, so young, deciding to stop enjoying things. Spoiling relationships by getting engaged at age 18 before they have even been dating for a year. Then inevitably deciding that it's not what they really wanted.

I wish people would just breathe. Follow relationships from the heart, instead of where their minds are telling them they should be. Isn't love felt in the heart, not the head? Thought so.

I suppose these things are being written because I am too much of a care free person to really care where my relationship is. If I am happy then that is that. I don't feel the need to rush to get engaged or move in. If I want it, I will do it. But I won't want something because I am suppose to want it.

People should not forget their innocence. I am a firm believer in age is just a number, but I do think people are trying to mature too quickly. Too many people are trying to give themselves up. What kills me, is that most of the time, people don't have a strong sense of self. And you need that. You need to know yourself inside and out. You need to love yourself, and believe in yourself. If you don't, as cliche as it is..."how are you going to love someone else"?

Listen to your heart people. Don't be prey to thoughts that might not even belong to you. Think long and hard about what your heart is really telling you. Because it never lies. Ever.